Boy Genius'
by Acies de Camena
Summary: Phineas and Ferb learn more about their family history, and decide that stories are not enough.  They want to see it in person!   sorry for the delay in update folks
1. The Family History

**The following is a plot bunny that popped into my head as I watched some Phineas and Ferb with my son. I've been fighting it…but alas, some things must be written. Now, I've tried to stay true to things in both "realities," but there are bound to be some discrepancies. Please mark them as a creative twist…**

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Linda Flynn-Fletcher walked silently over to the bookshelf in the living room and after checking only two shelves, pulled out a photo-album that she had not looked at in at least four years. The cover was hardbound in leather and on the front cover was a small gold colored pin in the shape of a Trilobite with a pair of golden feather wings spread behind it. With a quick puff, Linda blew the dust off the album and smiled. This was something she had not shared with her boys and doubted that her daughter even remembered it.

With a smile, Linda walked to the couch and sat down, placing the album on the coffee table in front of her. Brushing back a stray lock of her curly strawberry-blonde hair, she called out, "Kids, come and see what I've found!"

The first one in the room was her daughter Candace Flynn, the mirror of her mother at a younger age. Candace was skinny but not rail-thin, with the same head of strawberry-blonde hair. At fifteen, she rarely was not on her cell-phone or ogling the boy down the street, Jeremy. When she wasn't on the phone, however, she had a strange obsession with trying to get her brothers in trouble in the most imaginative ways…

Immediately following Candace was Phineas Flynn and Ferb Fletcher. Phineas was her brother by blood and the youngest of the family. Phineas, at nine years old, had the same color hair as his mother and sister, but not nearly as much of it. Phineas was bright eyed as usually, with a gleam that showed a desire to explore all things, drinking in as much as he could of life, and an imagination that was unrivaled.

"Hey mom, what's up?"

Ferb Fletcher, the middle child and step-brother to both Candace and Phineas, was not as thin as his siblings, and had a full head of thick, light-brown hair. At the age of twelve, Ferb was beginning to see the girls, but his own sense of adventure equaled that of his brother and the pair could be quite a handful. While he lacked the wild imagination of Phineas, he had shown great skill with puzzles and already shown a knack for engineering and creativeness.

Linda gestured for the children to come closer and sit down with her, "I thought you might all like to hear a tale about your ancestors, way back when they met the first time."

Candace rolled her eyes, "You've already told us about Fergsor and Dr Phineastein."

Linda 'tsked' at her daughter, "Oh no, this is not them, this story about the other side of the family. You see, they were the forefathers of our families. The people I'm talking about were on your fore-mothers' side of things. There was a beautiful woman, and two men that wanted nothing more than to be her husband. Now of course she could only choose one, and they're line became the Flynn's. The other man's descendents became the Fletchers as their daughters married into the family.

All three children were suddenly very interested and listened intently as their mother began to thumb through the pages. The first was a photo of a beautiful Blonde-haired woman, with the same eyes as Phineas. On her face was a pair of very wide circular glasses and her hair was pulled back in a tight pony-tail. Though she was very plainly beautiful, it could take a second glance to see it, since her face was smudged with grease and slung over her shoulder was a very large wrench. "Phineas, Candace, this is your 'not sure how many greats'-grandmother, Agatha Heterodyne."

Pointing to the next page, there were two pictures, each of a different man. The first one was of a man with green eyes and blazing red hair, he too looked as though he had just finished working in a mechanics shop, and the smile on his face said that he loved his work, "This is Agatha's husband, Gilgamesh Wulfenbach, though he went by 'Gil,' from what I was told."

"Who's the other guy?" Candace asked aloud.

"That is the man that was also trying to marry Agatha." Linda said with a chuckle, "Ferb, this is _your_ 'not sure how many greats'-grandfather, Tarvek Sturmvoraus." Looking at the picture, had dark brown hair that laid flat just like Ferbs' hair. He wore a pair of small round lens glasses, and his face was very serious.

"He doesn't look very happy." Candace said simply.

Linda smiled, "This picture was taken at the wedding of Gil and Agatha."

There was a very short pause before Linda continued, thumbing through different pictures as she went. "All three of them were supposedly great inventors. Grandfather Flynn called them 'Sparks,' and said they were all loony."

Phineas' eyes lit up, "What did he mean by 'Sparks?'

"Well," Linda said, "He always said that the best inventions in the world during those days were created by people with the 'spark.' I think that was just his way of saying that they had a knack for invention." Linda paused for a moment before stopping at a picture of a large castle

"Oh, now this was always your Grandfathers most entertaining part of the stories." Linda said with a wry chuckle.

"They had their own castle?" Phineas asked with an excited voice.

"Indeed they did. It was called Castle Heterodyne, and Grandfather told the craziest tales about it. Saying that their ancestors from way before Agatha's time had all been sparks, and each one had added more and more to the Castle. Eventually, the castle supposedly gained a mind of its' own and could reshape itself and even defend the town around it." Linda said with a crooked smile

"That sounds like something these two would make." Candace said with an exasperated sigh.

Ferb glanced at his brother and saw a familiar gleam in his eyes, and knew that the gears were churning in Phineas' mind, but before anything else could sink into definite plans, Linda continued.

"I don't know about that Candace, according to Grandfather, the castle actually was quite insane. Too much ego. I can't see these boys making anything that crazy."

Candace muttered, "I can."

As the early morning passed, Linda continued to thumb through the old photo album, showing the children all sorts of pictures of their families ancestors and their friends and even pets. As the pages turned the house pet, a Platypus named Perry, came in and crawled into Phineas' lap, chittering softly as the boy stroked the animals furry coat.

There was Violetta, the Smoke Knight and guardian of Tarvek. Phineas commented that she was like a Ninja when Linda explained that the Smoke Knights were actually stealthy and clever. Theopholous DuMedd; the cousin of Agatha, Sleipnir O'Hara; a friend of both Agatha and Gil, and Zeetha; who was a personal trainer of Agatha's each made multiple appearances in the pictures and then finally, was the house cat, Krosp.

"Now that is a big cat!" Candace said when she saw the picture of Krosp. The cat was easily the size of a bobcat with pure white fur. In the picture, Krosp was lying on the top of a counter, atop several wrenches that both Agatha and Gil seemed intent to get from him.

Linda chuckled, "Krosp was as crazy of a story as the Castle. Supposedly, he walked like humans do and could talk just as well as we do."

Perry the Platypus reached out and put a paw over the top of the picture and chittered agitatedly.

"Ah, don't be jealous fella." Phineas said with a smile, "You're much better than some talking cat."

Perry chattered again and then was silent and calm for the rest of the time that the family spent looking through the rest of the photo album. After they were done, and Linda was placing the Album back onto the shelf, she simply commented, "Wouldn't it be fun to travel back in time and see the family, see why they have such crazy stories about them?"

Phineas turned suddenly to Ferb, "Ferb, I know what we're going to do today!"


	2. Preparations

Phineas was intently scribbling on a piece of paper, whistling while he worked. The more intensely he concentrated on what he was doing, the more complex of a tune that he whistled. Right now, Phineas was scratching out designs for a time machine and as a result, he was whistling something that could probably rival Beethoven's Fifth. Phineas, Ferb, Candace, and Isabella had all been both forward and backwards in time before when they had borrowed the Time Machine from the Museum after repairing it. Phineas had wanted to build one of his own for a while now, but he just had not gotten around to it yet. Now that he was working on it, Phineas knew he had at least three separate improvements in mind on the design of the machine in the Museum.

Talking to himself as much as he was to Ferb, Phineas blurted out, "The density of the metal needs to be at least nineteen grams per cubic centimeter, but no more than twenty. Ideally we would be using gold…"

A few more notes later, and Phineas was drafting out the physical design when he suddenly chuckled, "It's got to have at least six seats...and a place for a pet carrier."

Furiously Phineas erased two structural lines and quickly revamped them, muttering about pounds per square inch and how much space he would need to add in for drink carriers. With a grin on his face, the youngest of the Flynn family went back over his notes again, then rechecked the draft of the machine, and finally with a sigh set his pencil down. Turning around he looked at Ferb and smiled when his brother held up a clipboard that showed a long list of items that he would need and gave him a 'thumbs up.'

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Ferb smiled calmly as he watched his step-brother, Phineas, as he began to doodly on a piece of paper and started whistling. The sound of his brother's music was calming to both of them and for Ferb, he especially enjoyed what he thought of a Prep time. This was the time where he could let his own creative mind wander. Phineas came up with the plans, there was no doubt about that, but the work and creation of the projects was Ferb's expertise. No doubt that Phineas helped, it was just that Ferb had a knack for it.

"_It's my Spark_." Ferb thought to himself, then blinked as he realized that he had picked up the term from his Step-Mother and when he thought of it in that terminology, it just felt…right.

Ferb picked up his clipboard and quickly began jotting down the tools that he knew he would need. Metric and standard wrenches, plus socket sets, a claw hammer, two-pound sledge, five-pound sledge hammer, a hand drill with bits for both wood and metal, a hand saw, hacksaw, band-saw, and a table saw…

When he had finished the 'standard' tool list, Ferb began to listen to his brother as Phineas began ticking off different design traits and material that he thought they would need.

"The density of the metal needs to be at least nineteen grams per cubic centimeter, but no more than twenty. Ideally we would be using gold…" was the first odd material that he heard Phineas mention and quickly put a note on the clip board to pick up some Tungsten. It was cheaper than gold and the density was nineteen point three-five grams per cubic centimeter, only point zero-three more than gold. With that note, he added to the tool list that he would need diamond tipped drill bits and saw blades.

After another thirty minutes of taking quick glances over his brother's shoulder, and getting a general idea of how much of each material he would need, Ferb quickly opened up the laptop on his work bench and punched in the list of supplies and e-mailed their usually delivery company. Once the order was placed he turned and faced Phineas, giving him a 'thumbs up' and holding up the clipboard.

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Phineas and Ferb quickly began to set up their work space in the back yard. The electrical cords were strewn about the yard in a disorganized but purposeful array. The acetylene torch waiting patiently to be fired up, and safety goggles hanging from the end of the picnic table, waiting to take their place on the faces of the two brothers.

After another forty-five minutes, an air-horn sounded from in front of the house. Phineas and Ferb both went to the side gate that opened from the backyard to the front and opened it up, seeing the familiar site of a large delivery of supplies. With an efficiency that could almost be considered military, five men in jeans and flannel shirts all quickly loaded crates onto hand carts and unloaded them from the back of the trailer, then the larger crates were unloaded by a forklift. Within another fifteen minutes, they supply truck was gone and the brother's were left with their supplies and tools in the back yard.

Ferb looked up and saw Candace watching them intently through the window in the Family Room, a familiar frustrated and almost maniacal (but not malicious) look in her eyes. Ferb waved.

Phineas rubbed his hands together and was about to reach out and open the small crate that was labled "DANGER: Plutonium; non-weapon grade" when he suddenly glanced around, then looked up at Ferb, "Hey, Where's Perry?"


	3. Perry's Mission

Perry the Platypus was curled up in a ball on Phineas' lap listening to Linda, the Masters' Mother, as she told the story of the old family. Perry had heard Linda call the children into the room, and even though he didn't need to, he wanted to hear what she had to say and so had followed Phineas and Ferb into the room. He knew the truth of the tales and knew that many of the things that their grandfather had said were true. Perry was a Construct much like Krosp, the cat in the picture. A few years ago, the Masters had chosen a Platypus as their house pet. It was an odd choice, even Perry admitted that, but their choice none the less. It was in the night that he was stolen away from the Child Masters and the work was done to him.

A secret organization know as the Smoke Knights had taken the platypus and placed a new mind in the head, and the mind had been that of a direct descendant of Violetta, who was a Smoke Knight herself, and tasked originally with the safety of Tarvek. Tarvek, when he thought he was on his death bed, had tasked Violetta with the safety of Agatha Heterodyne. As generations past, the Smoke Knights became more and more what they were intended to be, a hidden organization that worked for the safety of others rather than simply tools to be used by crazed Sparks. The government was funding the Smoke Knights, and had some say in what happened in the organization. The Knights were mostly left to their own devices as they dealt exclusively with Spark related issues and it was confirmed long ago that trying to use sparks for normal military or government purposes was a bad idea.

The decision had been an easy one for Perry. He would be trapped in the small body of a platypus and forever be a house pet, but he knew it must be done for the safety and security of the Masters. When the transfer had taken place, Perry had been returned home that night and used a small hypnotic suggestion to plant the idea into the minds of Phineas and Ferb to name their 'pet' Perry. After that night, Perry was in perfect position to serve the dual roles of his duties as a Smoke Knight to protect the Masters, and to have a secret base for taking care of Dr. Doofenshmirtz.

Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz himself was a spark, but he did not know it, or even what it would mean if anyone told him that he was a Spark. The Doofenshmirtz family was not known for having Sparks in their bloodline, and as far as the records showed, Heinz was the first. By the time he had been identified by the Smoke Knights, it was too late to save his mind. When a spark begins to create, their minds go to a place that is referred to by the Smoke Knights as the 'Madness.' When in the Madness, Sparks often make no sense and become highly unstable. Heinz Doofenshmirtz was found first by a Spark that called himself Professor Destructicon, and the Professor let Heinz stay in the 'Madness' too often and too long, and it destabilized his sense of right and wrong.

Doofenshmirtz owns and operates a business called Doofenshmirtz Evil Inc. and considers himself and Evil Genius. What is odd is that since Perry first began foiling Heinz's 'diabolical plans,' Doofenshmirtz has become somewhat attached to his 'arch-nemesis' and often is upset if Perry has not shown up in a normal fashion to disrupt him, showing classic signs of co-dependent psychosis. Perry himself often looked forward to those almost daily occasions when he gets to escape the yard and feel the adventure of stopping Doofenshmirtz. It was always a challenge, and the things that Heinz created _had_ to be taken seriously, but it was still fun.

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Perry followed the Masters outside into the yard and followed dutifully as they began to set up for their next adventure. His patience was remarkable, but Perry knew he had to report this latest adventure to the Major. There were certain types of experiments that must always be reported, and time travel was definitely one of them. There was always such risk that they would do something to disrupt the time line, and throw everything out of balance. It wasn't long before he heard the family car start up and pull out of the garage and he knew that the Mother was now safely away.

Perry patiently waited until the Master Phineas began to 'Heterodyne,' Perry wished he could stay and listen, because the music that Phineas makes when he 'Dynes was relaxing to the Construct, but he had to go. With a quick glance to be sure no one else was looking, the Platypus quickly jumped up on his hind legs like a human and ran to his secret entrance under the patio chairs. Pressing a button on the bottom of the seat, the trap door below Perry opened up and he fell into the tube slide.

Sliding down nearly sixty feet, Perry came out of the tube a few paces into his personal base of operations. The floors and walls were made of solid smooth concrete, polished to a shine that reflected the image of the platypus. The ceiling, also concrete, had multiple inset lighting fixtures that illuminated the room brightly.

On the wall behind Perry, there were racks of various weapons that the Smoke Knight very rarely used, but kept in perfect working condition. To the left were Perry's various 'tools of the trade.' Grappling hooks, some propelled and some thrown, two prepped and ready parachute packs, as well as several devices created for him by the 'R&D' (research and development) team. Most of the R&D were low to mid level sparks, but because the Smoke Knights were more organized than they were back in the old days, only the best equipment was actually sent out to field agents like Perry.

The wall to the right was lined with various 'wanted' posters, maps, and several bookshelves filled with all sorts of different literature, including some books about Sparks that he would one day give to the Masters.

Directly in front of him were a large monitor, a 'egg' chair, and keyboard. Perry took two steps forward and the monitor in front of him suddenly flared to life. After only a moment, gnarled and tough looking middle aged man with a head of white hair and neatly trimmed but thick mustache moved into the view of the monitor. Dressed in a decorated military uniform, the man looked the role of the seasoned military officer and his deep voice only added to that image.

"Major Monogram here."

Perry chittered at the screen.

"Ah, Agent P." Major Monogram said simply. "You have something to report?"

Perry leaned forward slightly and began to type furiously on the keyboard. One of his least recognized skills was the ability to type at ninety-three words per minute. As soon as he was finished, Perry hit the 'Enter' button and waited patiently.

Major Monogram scratched his chin for a moment before speaking, "I see. As this involves Time Travel, you _must_ accompany them on this journey."

Perry chittered with frustration and typed again.

"I see. We will check on Dr. Doofenshmirtz immediately and let you know if you will be required to stay behind." Major Monogram said quickly. Turning, he looked off to someone off vision from the monitor, "Carl, Please gather the latest intelligence report on Dr. Doofenshmirtz."

Immediately, the high tone of Carl's young voice sounded from somewhere off camera. "Right away Sir."

Perry waiting patiently until the young intern stepped into view of the cam and handed the Major a single sheet of paper. Carl was young, no more that nineteen or twenty, with brown hair turned to the screen and waved, "Hiya Perry."

Perry chittered at the screen and waved just as the Major looked up from the report, glance at Carl, then back to the report. "Did you typo this Carl?"

The young intern looked at the Major, his jaw slack with surprise. "Sir!"

Major Monogram shook his head, "No, of course not. Sorry Carl." The Major shook his head and glanced up at the screen again. "Well agent P, it looks like Dr Doofenschmirtz is up to something. It appears that he has been buying up all coffee in the Tri-State area."

The Major paused for a moment and glanced over at Carl. Carl nodded and the Major turned back to the monitor quickly. "You _have_ to stop him Agent P." Grasping both sides of the monitor, the Major pulled the camera close and looked desperately at the agent on the other side of the connection. "Please, you must hurry agent P! We are out of coffee! We are _out of co_…"

The screen went blank as Perry reached out and shut down the connection to the home office. Perry quickly stepped to the wall of his base and pulled several items he thought he may need to handle Doofenschmirtz this time. Strapping on his jet pack, the Platypus Smoke Knight quickly rocketed out of the lair down a long escape tunnel and out into the open air through a manhole cover two blocks from the Masters' home and turned slightly, angling his path for Doofenschmirtz Evil Incorporated.


	4. The Major, the Intern, and the Recruiter

Major Mongram sat back in his chair, rubbing his face in frustration. Looking into the now black screen, the reflection showed an older man. White haired, with a white 'Burt Reynolds' mustache. The face was strong, but weathered, showing a man that never faltered in his responsibilities, no matter how heavily they weighed on him. His uniform was that of a decorated veteran. Crisp and clean, and the medals reminded him of the wrinkles on his face. A sign of all that he's done, and all that he's endured. The uniform and his face both had more space to be used.

"I think I'm getting to old for this Carl." Major Monogram said with a sigh.

"Nonsense sir. You're only as old as you think you are." Carl replied with his higher, young voice.

The intern, Carl, was something of an anomaly within the Smoke Knights. Almost everyone within the Knights either had a military background, was a favored minion, or was a Spark. Carl however, was something else. At first look, you would see his mousy brown hair, glasses, and lab coat and immediately think he was a Minion, or low end Spark. What he was however, was a technical genius. He was able to work with the equipment that Sparks made, plus he was certified to work with almost any computer program made. Taking apart a system and putting it back together was something Carl could do blindfolded as easily as Major Monogram could take apart and clean his .45 blindfolded.

Major Monogram smirked at the slip-up that Carl had made as he repeated, "I think I'm getting to old for this Carl."

"You think too much Sir." Carl replied with a grin.

"What is my next appointment?" the Major asked, rubbing the temple on the right of his head.

Carl pulled out his phone quickly, and as he was placing a computer tower onto his work desk, he hit the front of the phone a couple times and nodded as he read the screen. "Your next meeting is in fifteen minutes. It is your six-month update from the Recruitment division. After that, you are clear until 1500 local time."

The Major nodded, stood up and stretched out as he made his way to the coffee pot. It was half empty. "You better hurry Perry."

The Major sipped on his cup o' joe and watched his intern as Carl meticulously took apart the machine and inspected each piece. Cleaning when it was needed and discarding one small piece taken off of the main board. The Major had no idea what he was doing, but he respected the young man for how he did it. The intern approached every task ahead of him with diligence, dedication, and patience. It was apparent when watching Carl, this was a master, and the computer was his trade.

Glancing at his watch, the major read 0913. It was time to sit in the chair. The Major was learning to despise this chair. Even at his age, he would much rather be trudging through a jungle that trapped in an office chair. He knew his duties however, and took his seat.

Like clockwork, the screen flared to life at precisely 0915. Looking at him through the camera was an older woman who looked every bit the smiling and matronly grandmother you would expect to see pulling cookies off the baking sheet or knitting in a corner in a rocking chair and humming to herself. Instead, as soon as she saw the Major, she snapped a sharp salute.

"At ease." The Major said, then smiled. "Speak freely during this meeting Elda."

The woman identified as Elda nodded. "Yes Sir."

The Major turned suddenly to Carl, and smiled as he saw the intern was holding out a stack of papers for him as he inspected _something_ from the computer. Taking the documents, the Major quickly scanned the pages before looking up to Monitor again. "I see that you've been busy." Scanning back over another spot, the Major's eyebrow raised. "A bit proactive as well I see."

"Yes Sir. I thought that it was best to do so. They have so much potential together, that I could not see a reason not to try to imprint them as quickly as possible."

The Major nodded, "I agree. Well done Elda."

"Thank you Major."

"I will admit Elda, I had serious doubts about this program when it was first initiated." Major Monogram stated. Seeing the subtle flinch from Elda, the Major quickly added, "Not because I doubted you. After all, you trained me. I simply doubted that we could find the caliber of recruits we need from this initiative."

Elda was about to speak, but the Major held up a hand and smiled. "This recruit however, shows amazing potential. Creative, clever, fast acting, works will with and around Sparks." A short pause and the Major's eyes opened wide as he looked over the last part of the assessment. "This says here that she's already imprinted with a Spark?"

Elda nodded and laughed. "Bless her heart too, she's so in love with him."

"Does he know?" Monogram asked.

"No Sir. He is completely unaware Sir."

The Major nodded, "I think it best that it remain that way, for now. Let the Spark realize it on his own."

Elda nodded sharply. "Yes Sir." There was a pause in the discussion as Elda appeared to be distracted by something else on her screen. After only a few moment, she focused on the Major again. "Sir, I just saw on my GPS Tracker that I have on the recruit, that she has entered the area of the Spark. If you would like, I can patch you into our surveillance and you can observe."

The Major simply nodded and then waited for a moment. Another application started on his screen and he watched as the video rezzed into focus and the recruit…

….walked into the yard and smiled. Isabella was quiet for a long moment as she watched Phineas and Ferb as they were welding together a metal frame for something. She never knew what they would be making next, but Isabella was always eager to be involved because that meant she would be near Phineas. Finally, after going unnoticed for a couple of minutes she approached Phineas and said in a very sing-song pitch, "What'cha doin?"

Phineas handed off the welding torch to Ferb, then turned and smiled back at his friend. "We're building a Time Machine to go back and see our ancestors."

"Didn't you already do the time travel thing once?" Isabella asked.

Phineas nodded, "Yeah, but that was in that old machine, and we're building a better one. It even has cup holders!"

"Ooh, okay then. Do you want some help?" Isabella asked.


	5. Interlude : Candace

Candace watched silently, the digital video recorder set up in the window sill of the Living room, recording everything as it took place in the backyard. The red-haired girl had watched silently, minus a few giggles, for almost a full hour now and was perfectly satisfied that the Camera would catch anything that happened for the next few hours. Sure the hard drive was going to be full on the computer, but after she burned it onto a DVD, she could erase the data and have her proof in hand!

"I _will_ bust you boys this time!" she said with a laugh that bordered just under maniacle

A knock on the door broke her concentration and with an exasperated sigh, she turned and walked to the other front of the house and answered the door without looking to see who was there.

Opening the door, Candace saw her best friend, her bff, her cohort, her accomplice of choice, Stacy Hirano. Nearly the same height as Candace and just as thin, but her long and straight black hair and almond shaped eyes clearly showed her Japanese heritage. Wearing her turquoise shirt and blue skirt, Stacy looked ready for fun.

"Hey Candace!" Stacy said with a smile.

"Oh Hey Stacy. What's going on?" Candace asked while still trying to keep the back window in her peripheral view.

Stacy snapped her fingers, "Focus Candace, your friend's over here." Candace turned to face Stacy fully now, so Stacy continued. "Let's go hit the arcade and a matinee. The new Honey-Dew movie just came out today!"

"Oh, I don't know." Candace said, "I really wa…"

Stacy cut Candace off quickly, "I thought I might need some back up."

Reaching to the side of the door, out of Candace's view, Stacy grabbed something and pulled. Now standing in the doorway was a young man, near the same age as Candace. He stood taller than Candace by a couple of inches, and like Candace, was thin bodied. The young man was wearing jeans, a white t-shirt and another shirt. The outer shirt was a collared, button down shirt but was left unbuttoned.

"J-Jeremy." Candace stammered.

"C-Candace." Jeremy replied, playfully mocking Candace.

Candace giggled for a moment, then asked, "What are you doing here?"

"Oh Stacey said that I should come and help rescue you from yourself. Something about obsessing over your brothers and blah blah blah." The young man replied, then paused for a moment before asking "So, do you feel like being rescued?"

Candace started to balk again, but Jeremy stepped into the doorway and grabbed Candace's hand and started pulling her out while still speaking to convince her, "c'mon Candace, we can share a bucket of popcorn at the movie."

As soon as Jeremy had grasped her hand, Candace giggled and replied "Okay."

As the three teens were walking across the path to the sidewalk from the front door, Jeremy remarked. "The boys will be fine, they've got all their friends back there with them. How much trouble could they really get into."

Candace gritted her teeth, but when glancing at her boyfriend, forgot all about the boys again and went joyfully to the movie.


	6. Interlude : Baljeet & Buford

As Phineas and Ferb were receiving their truck delivery, In a backyard only a few door down from their home two children sat at a piece of patio furniture with a chess board between them. as they neared the end of their third game of the morning. The two boys could not be more opposite, not only in appearance, but in personality, and some mistakenly believed, intelligence.

The First boy, named Baljeet, rubbed at his temple staring at the board and struggled to decide his next move. He was shorter than his opponent and quite a bit thinner as well. His dark brown skin was natural as a native of India, and though he had a very apparent accent, he spoke very exceptional English, almost never using a slang word and only rarely using conjunctions in his speech. Baljeet's blue shirt was partially covered with his jean overalls ending in shorts and the look of concentration in his eyes was fierce. Calculating all the risks and rewards of his next move, Baljeet reached out and shifted his Knight, taking the pawn of his opponent.

The boy sitting across the patio table, was Buford. Buford was a bully, and he looked the part. Standing nearly a foot taller than his chess opponent and outweighing him by nearly Baljeets' full weight, Buford had a light complexion with broad shoulders and a jaw far to pronounced for one of his age. Buford even dressed the part of the bully, wearing a black t-shirt with a white skull print, dark khaki shorts, and hiking boots with the laces loosened. Even his voice was lower than one would expect of a child.

"Good Move." Buford grunted as he quickly and almost seemingly without thought grabbed his queen and shifted the piece.

Baljeet studied the odd move and after a few long moments sighed. "You have me four moves from Checkmate."

Buford did not speak, simply nodding in acknowledgment that he knew this as well.

"How do you do it?" Baljeet asked, frustration evident in his voice. "I have to help you on your homework every day, you have issues remembering to tie your shoes, and cannot even tell me what we did yesterday, but I cannot beat you in one of the most intellectual games played in modern society."

"Don' know 'jeet." Buford said, shrugging indifferently.

Baljeet shook his head, finally smiling. "It must be a genetic gift for strategy from General Khrizan."

"That's the one guy right?" Buford asked, furrowing his brow, "The guy you said we are both related to from way back."

Baljeet nodded. "He is out many times Great-Grandfather who was associated with our many-times Great Grandmother, Bangladesh DuPree." Baljeet paused for a moment, then spoke again "Our family trees connect by the roots but grew in separate places Cousin."

Buford, resting his elbow on the table suddenly pointed emphatically at Baljeet. "No knows that, Got it?"

Baljeet nodded and the two were silent for a short while before Baljeet broke the silence. "Shall we go see what is happening with Phineas and Ferb?"

Buford grunted indifferently but when Baljeet stood, so did Buford and the pair started walking out of Baljeets' backyard.

"You tell anyone we're related, and I'll pound ya." Buford said as a final warning.


	7. Heterodyne Roast

This Chapter took me a while to come up with. I knew it was the next one that I wanted to do and while it's easy to come up with a scheme for Dr Doofenschmirtz….the reason behind the scheme isn't so easy. Anyhow…I hope I did him justice…

**I am attempting an Edit on this page now…for some reason a large portion of Doofenschmirtz's dialogue is not coming through correctly... I am assuming it's because the words are typed as a large single word. **

##################

Perry had snuck aboard a local news chopper and waited patiently as the crew flew over the congested downtown traffic. Looking at his watch, Perry was a bit surprised by the sight. It was nearly ten in the morning and while the traffic down town was never good, it looked like rush hour down there. As the chopper moved closer and closer to his destination, Perry quickly opened the door of the chopper and saluted the pilot before jumping out.

As he began to Freefall, Perry reach to his vest and pulled the cord. A sudden series of clicks and a quick whirring sound, barely audible over the wind in his ear, caused his back pack to shred and the framework of a small hang-glider extended out with the fabric attached. The glider caught the wind and Perry quickly found himself gliding through the air. Banking to the right, Perry began to approach the skyscraper that was the residence of his nemesis.

Perry looked down on the large balcony atop the Doofenschmitz Evil Incorporated building from his hang-glider with a frown. Perry had decided to come in silent, but as he listened to the blaring horns of the stopped traffic below, he realized silence probably wasn't needed. Just as he was about to touch down on the balcony at full speed, the Platypus Smoke Knight hit the quick release on his shoulder straps. This release not only freed the agent of the glider, but also triggered the glider to retract quickly, folding in again on its self into a neat package. Minus the backpack that had once covered it. Perry heard the collapsed glide hit the balcony just as he finished his tuck and roll, coming to his feet ready for whatever may be waiting for him.

Glancing around the balcony, Agent P saw no one around, nor did he see anything that looks out of the ordinary. Quickly he ran to the access doorway to the building, but again decided to go cautious and found his way to the ventilation system. Quickly taking his small toolset from under his hat, Agent P disarmed the new alarm system that Dr Doofenschmirtz had installed, then shimmied down the shaft.

Several minutes later, Perry was looking through the grate in the high ventilation shaft, looking down at Heinz Doofenschmirtz, watching the self-proclaimed evil genius as he work on some new contraption. As he watched Heinz, Perry noticed that the man was shaking uncontrollably and was having trouble performing the delicate work he was attempting.

Perry, finally deciding he had the element of surprise, dropped through the grate and landed lightly atop the work bench, directly in front of the man.

With a bellow of surprise, Dr. Doofenschmirtz pushed against the bench, toppling over the stool he was sitting on. With a crash, the Doctor hit the ground, then sprang back up and eyed Perry as the Smoke Knight caught the Soldering Iron that Heinz had tossed into the air in surprise and deftly set the iron onto its stand.

"PerrythePlatypus!" Heinz said, so fast that Perry actually cocked his head to the side in pure confusion.

This confused looked did not phase Heinz at all, "Ooh,thatwasaverygoodcatch!"

Perry shook his head, staring blankly at Dr. Doofenschmirtz.

"Don'tlooksosurprised, I'vecomplimentedyoubefore." Heinz said just as rapidly, then began to pace back and forth quickly. "."

Perry, barely making out the words 'coffee' and 'taken,' nodded in acknowledgment, getting the gist of what his Nemesis had said.

"Well." Heinz began, "Aren'tyouattallcuriousaboutwhyI'vetakenallthecoffee?"

Agent P blew out a frustrated sigh and chittered, gesturing for the Doctor to slow down his speech.

"Oh,amItalkingtofastforyou?" Heinz asked. When Perry nodded, the Doctor sighed, picked up his stool and sat down again, then began to speak again, this time deliberately slowing his speech, though in places the words still ran together. "Iwas woken upthe other morning, just as I am, everymorning. Tothe sounds of the honkinghorns of the earlymorning rush hour. Thatevening, when I was tryingto take mynap, I was again rudely awakened bythe afternoon rushhour of commuters goinghome." As Heinz finished, Perry noticed that the both of the Doctors legs were twitching quickly and his hand would not hold still, greatly exaggerating each sentence as the Doctor finished it.

Perry shrugged, not understanding the importance, but Heinz was already beginning the next leg of his tale. "Soafter I was wokeagain so rudely, I hatcheda nefarious scheme tostop all those early risers from wakingup ontime for their early morning trafficjam."

Heinz rubbed his hands together maniacally before continuing, "The wonderful aromas, thejoltof caffeine, the automatic brewers. None ofthese things workright withoutCoffee! All thosepeople would wakeup slowly, goabouttheir morningroutines sluggishly. Theywould allbelate forwork because I took alltheCoffeeINTHETRI-STATE AREA!" As Heinz finished, he was once again speaking rapidly, and cackling with pride at his own genius.

Then suddenly, faster than Perry could react, Heinz shot out of his chair, right at Perry. The Platypus flinched, thinking an attack was coming. When no blow was landed, Perry saw that Heinz had simply grabbed a coffee cup. Perry watched, fascinated as the Doctor sipped from the cup, his body perfectly still and calm. When Heinz set down the cup however, he began to twitch quickly again.

"Then,…" Heinz paused for a moment as Perry grabbed the coffee cup from the top of the work bench and handed to Heinz. As soon as he had the coffee in his hands, he continued, "…I had this idea that I should brew my own coffee, since I'm now the only person with coffee to brew. Sip I would be able to make a fortune with the coffee I sold. Sip The Lines would be out the door! Sip So this morning, I made my own brewing station based on some plans from an old manuscript I found in a garage sale. sip Yes, I go to garage sales. sip Take a look, it's right over there" Sip The Doctor finished, pointing to the wall behind where Perry had initially dropped in.

Turning to look, Perry saw a large machine that looked like I should never be used to brew coffee. It has several steam whistles, a large gear in the back, multiple steam pressure releases, and on the front was a single golden Trilobyte, the symbol of the Heterodynes. Perry turned and look at Heinz, then pointed at the Trilobyte.

"Oh that. I saw it … sip … on the cover of the book and liked it, so I put… sip … it on my brand new Coffee Brewinator!"

Perry quickly glanced back to the work bench and saw it. There, propped against desk easel was an old leather bound tome, flipped open to a page with designs for what looked like a robotic…nanny. Perry shook his head again, Heinz was like any father and could not see that his daughter Vannessa was well beyond the need for a nanny. Perry jumped when suddenly Dr Doofenschmirtz was suddenly standing next to him, refilling his coffee mug.

"This coffee is Amazing!" The Doctor exclaimed suddenly and then headed back to his bench and began working again, completely ignoring Perry.

Perry went into 'inconspicuous' mode and began to devise his own plan. As the doctor continued to work on his daughters' new nanny, Perry began replacing the contents of the Brewinator with decaffeinated coffee. Every fifteen minutes, Perry would bring Heinz a new cup of coffee, each one with less and less of the extreme blend, and more and more of the decaf in each cup. After only a couple hours, Perry heard a loud 'thunk' and smiled as he realized that the Evil Genius had passed out on his work bench. With a quick press of a button on his miniature cell phone, Perry summoned the laborers of the Smoke Knights who quickly and methodically entered the Skyscraper and removed all of the coffee from the building except for one bag of decaf. Agent P took this last bag and placed it onto the work bench next to Heinz. That way, when the man awoke, he would see the tool of his undoing.

Perry also quickly gathered the Heterodyne notebook from the bench and with a smirk, photo-copied the plans for the Nanny and left them on the desk, securely under the bag of Decaf. Perry grinned again as he looked at the title of the page…

###########

Several hours later, Dr Doofenschmirtz lifted his head off the work bench, wiped the drool from the corner of his mouth, and glanced around. Heinz immediately noticed that the area was quiet and by the lack of light coming through the windows, knew the sun was down.

Heinz looked to the wall and saw that his Coffee Brewinator was in pieces. Turning quickly, he saw the bag of Decaf on the bench and knew what had happened. Clenching his fists in frustration, the Evil Genius looked to the sky and bellowed "Curse you Perry the Platypus!"

Dropping his eyes back to the bench, Heinz saw the paper under the bag of decaf and pulled it out from under the cursed coffee grounds. With a smile, Heinz said "Well, at least I still have you Von Pinn."


	8. Today is Yesterday!

At nearly three in the afternoon, Phineas, Ferb, Isabella, Baljeet and Buford all stood back watching the new time machine as it cycled through a self diagnostics test. The large machine looked roughly like a very large egg, about the size of a smaller schoolbus, with steel framework encircling it. The 'egg' was lying on its' side, the wider end of the egg was actually the front of the machine, while the more pointed end was the rear. The only part of the machine what was not white and covered banded with steel was at the front, where the two pilot seats were clearly visible through the window. The window as made of a material that the boys had also created that they called 'glassteel.'

"So, Umm, why an Egg?" Buford suddenly asked.

Ferb, turned to Buford and in his calm serene voice that always seemed to hold more widom than it should replied, "To represent that age old question."

When Buford just stared back blankly, Baljeet added "What came first, the chicken or the Egg?"

Again, Buford just stared blankly, so Baljeet explained further, "What came first, the chicken or the Egg…the only way to get that answer, would be to travel in time to see the truth for yourself."

Buford grunted, "Oh, got it."

Phineas suddenly turned to Isabella, "Are you all alone today?"

Isabella nodded quickly. "The Fireside Girls all decided that today we would all earn our 'Working Apart' Badges.

"Oh, Well okay then." Phineas said with a grin. "Glad you're here then."

Phineas, turning his focus back to the Time Egg, completely missed the sudden contented sigh that Isabella let slip.

Finally, a soft whine issued from the machine and then went silent. "Okay Ferb, sounds like everthing went well."

Baljeet stopped the brothers as they approached the nearly indecipherable door into the machine. "Do you not want to look at the Diagnostics report?"

Both Phineas and Ferb stopped, glanced back at Baljeet, and Phineas simply said, "Nah, sounded like everything went fine."

As Baljeet started to protest again, Buford stepped up behind his cousin and grabbed the smaller boy and grabbed Bajeet and slung him over his shoulder in mid-stride toward the now opening door of the Time Machine. "Less talking, more walking."

Once inside, Phineas spoke from the pilot's seat while Ferb used hand signals, much like a stewardess on an airplane, to direct everyone's attention

"Welcome aboard your local Time Travel ship. Please note that there are no emergency exits other than the door you came in. Also, please note that there are seat belts that should be worn at all times while we travel through the Time Stream. In front of each of you, on the back of the seat ahead of you, you will see two dispensers and two corresponding buttons. The button on the left dispenses apple juice, while the button on the right dispenses red licorice. Please enjoy your refreshments"

###########

Just as all the children were strapping themselves into the seats inside the machine and Phineas was describing the automated refreshment dispensers, Candace, Jeremy, and Stacey were all walking through the gate into the backyard. Jeremy and Stacey had both wanted to go through the front door, but Candace insisted that they go into the backyard first. Candace had used the excuse that she wanted to be certain that they were okay, but Jeremy and Stacey knew that the truth was that she really wanted to catch them as they once again did something 'Bust Worthy.'

Walking into the back yard, all three of the teenagers immediately locked eyes on the giant reinforced egg and could see both Phineas and Ferb through the window in the front of the egg, quickly flipping switches.

"Aha! I knew they would be up to something" Candace said triumphantly.

"Well, yeah." Stacey said simply, her hands resting on her hips. "When aren't they?"

Candace's wide grin of elation suddenly faltered and she glanced to her friend and replied in a much less enthusiatic voice, "Well, okay. Point Taken. I've got them this time…I've recorded the entire thing."

Jeremy shrugged it all away and quickly began strolling forward, "Well let's see what they've got going on this time!"

Stacey, just as adventurous, started to follow, but Candace grabbed them both by the shoulder, "No, wait! Don't you see what's about to happen?"

"Umm, no?" Stacey answered.

Candace sighed, not certain why this needed explaining. Again. "If we go over there to investigate, we will some be sucked into whatever it is that they are doing. Whenever that happens, we all end up lost somewhere or on some crazy ride."

Jeremy smiled knowingly, "That's true, but we always have so much fun together when we do." When Jeremy reach out again, taking Candace's hand in his, he could see the momentary struggle of her personalities. Candace and Jeremy both knew that they loved spending time together, still young and in love, but they both knew that she wanted to finally bust her brothers. To bring to light their many mischevious designs and adventures. Finally, Jeremy added the last push that he knew would win her over, "Let's check it out. If we do, you might be able to get more evidence."

Candace giggled, her hand tightening on Jeremy's as she felt her resistance give way. "Okay." Candace responsed as she stepped up next to her boyfriend, standing shoulder to shoulder with him as the couple began walking towards the reinforced Egg.

Turning to glance over his shoulder and Stacey, Jeremy gave a small wink to Candace's best friend who returned the wink with a 'thumbs up.'

As the trio of teenagers each stepped slowly into the Egg and glanced around, Candace started asking questions immediately, her focus not on what she was doing or what was happening to her, but on her brothers.

"What have you two build this time?" Candace demanded as Jeremy guided her into a seat next to him.

"We're going back to visit Agatha, Gil, and Tarvok!" Phineas replied excitedly.

"Wait, what?" Candace asked in surprise, "You mean the people from the photos Mom showed us?" Candace asked as Stacey help Jeremy buckle her in.

"This is another time machine!" Candace suddenly said, her voice rising to an almost squeek in surprise. When Ferb nodded in answer, Candace's eyes opened widely, "No, no! Don't you remember what happened last time? My future self warned us not to do this again!"

"Yeah, but we'll be more careful this time." Phineas said with a smile, then glanced at the doorway again. "Oh, there you are Perry."

Everyone in the Time Machine glanced over at the door and watched as the small platypus casually strolled into machine, chittered, then found its way to the open door of the pet carrier securly bolted to the floor directly behind Phineas' chair.

Suddenly, Ferb looked up and Phineas and asked as he pushed the button to close the door. "Have you never wondered why Perry always seems to show up, just as we're about to embark on a journey such as this?"

Phineas looked back at his half brother and the two stared at each other in silence for nearly five seconds before Phineas said, "Nope."

Phineas slapped his hand down suddenly and the Time machine hummed to life. Everyone turned their eyes to the window in the front of the machine and it seemed that looking the scene outside, the ship had begun to rotate in place, spinning quickly. No one within the maching however could feel any physical movement of the machine at all, even as the view continued to spin and swirl, eventually so fast that it looked like someone had stuck a spoon in their vision and began stirring quickly at the edge's, making everything swirl together.

"Ugh, I'm going to be sick." Candace said with a gulp.

At the same moment that Baljeet tried to squirm as far away as possible from Candace, Isabella quickly pulled a small brown sack from the pouch hanging from the side of the seat and handed it to Candace. Candace looked down at the bag for a moment, swallowed hard, then just shook her head at the young Fireside Girl. Isabella placed the bag back into its proper place then faced forward again. "Oh, I think we're stopping."

Candace, looking up, saw what the others were now seeing. The swirling colors slowly becan to slow and take form, and inside the machine, everyone gasped in surprise except Candace, Phineas, and Ferb. Directly ahead of them was nothing but a large and wide hallway made of large blocks of stone on both sides, with one having the stone opening into large stained-glass windows with large red velvet drapes framing the same windows.

"We're here!" Phineas said excitedly as he pushe his way out of the solitary exit of the Time Machine. Landing at the bottom of the double step out of the machine, Phineas stepped onto the stone and spread his arms, "Ah, the past is today!"

Phineas froze at the same time as everyone else did as they were in the process of exiting the machine. A loud, deep, and somewhat eagerly crazy voice echoed through the hallway. "Ooh, Mistress. We have Visitors in the Hall of Flames."

Candace shivered and hid quickly behind Jeremy as Ferb glanced around and said in his ever steady voice. "Well, that is unexpected."


	9. Visitors!

Lying on it's back was a large mechanical beast. Shaped roughly like a great cat, the ten-foot long body had non-retractable claws that eneded with foot long. The mouth of the great mechanical feline was lined with razor sharp teeth that when shut, resembled an extra-large bear trap. The belly of the beast was opened in what looked like a small service hatch and sticking out from the hatch were the legs of a woman covered with a brown wool skirt. Under the bottom of the skirt, you could catch a glimps of the black and white striped leggings that the woman wore.

The top half of the woman half in and half out of the large clockwork feline was a beautiful blonde-haired woman with large round glaces. The woman was larger-than average breasted with large eyes that when she was not concentrated showed an inner goodness that could not be dampened. The brown wool top of her shirt that matched the skirt she wore was folded nearly and draped over the rear leg of the beast and the white undershirt she wore was marred with grease, just as her arms and left cheek were. The blonde hair was pulled back into a tight braid, but strands had begun to come loose and were falling into her line of sight.

A loud clang sounded from within the belly of the beast and the clockwork feline growled. A single grease coated hand popped up from inside and patted the mechanical cat. "There there, we're almost done."

A loud sound that resembled a purr rolled from the head of the cat.

It was then that she heard the Castle "Ooh, Mistress. We have Visitors in the Hall of Flames."

Pushing back on the rear leg locomotion drive shaft, the Heterodyne woman righted herself and blew a lock of her golden hair out of her eyes. "Tourists?"

"Mistress," The disembodied voice of The Castle replied, "They are in the Hall of Flames. I can certainly treat them like tourists if you like." The Castle's voice ending in a hopeful tone.

"Enemies?" Agatha asked with a sigh.

"No, I don't think so. _IF_ I were to guess, I would say they are joy riding kids that stole some Sparks new toy. They are all young and simply appeared in the hall in a machine of some kind." The Castle answered. "I can escort them out if you….Hmm…"

At the sudden curious pause, Agatha felt her own curiousity suddenly piqued and raised an eyebrow. This pause was also enough to make the large white cat on the closest work bench lift his head. "Unless they brought tribute to the Emperor, boot them out."

"Hush Krosp." Agatha said dismissively. "What is it Castle?"

"Well, they claim they have come to visit their relatives. What is strange is that the two boys seem to be curious, rather than frightened." The Castle replied, the added with a satisfied tone. "The rest seem to show the proper amount of fear. May I send some Jaëger to greet them?"

"No, please don't. We already have enough people that run from the gates as they scream in fear." Agatha said simply.

"Ah, it's such a beautiful sound." The Castle interjected.

"Guide them to the Dining Hall and have Moloch meet them half-way to talk to them. Study them and tell me what you think before they arrive. Let Gil and Tarvek know to meet me there, they will gather the rest. It's nearly dinner time anyhow."

"Can I take them through the Dungeons?" The Castle asked, it's voice rising in a way that could only be called eager.

"No," Agatha said sternly. "What did I say about the Dungeons being a Tourist attraction?"

"But Mistre…"

"No." Agatha said with a grimace.

"The blood is almost all washed off!" The Castle argued.

Agatha pointed to herself and bellowed, "Heterodyne!"

"Fine." The Castle muttered before sending out to completed the tasks assigned to it. The first being the beginning of the tour through the Castle for the visitors, then off to advise the Mistresses best Minion Moloch.

The castle came upon Moloch just as he and his wife, Snaug, as they were trying to clean one of the medical rooms. Moloch, standing just above average in height with black hair and a black beard was a former soldier, and excellent mechanic, and deathly afraid of the Castle. This pleased the Castle greatly.

In a low and sinister voice, the Castle spoke to Moloch and revelled in the sudden look of terror that crossed his face. "Grrreeetings Moloch."

The man jumped as did his brown haired mousey wife. "AGH!" they screamed together.

"We have visitors. You are to meet them in the Red Hall and escort them to the Dining Hall. I will provide the path. Engage them in conversation." The Castle commanded curtly.

"Is this like the time that Baron Dillint sent in his mechanical assassin squad and you wanted me to have a conversation with them?" Moloch asked, both angered at the memory and terrified that it might actually be the same setup.

The Castle gasped, pretending to be hurt by the accusation. "Well of course not. The Mistress simply wants the kids escorted."

Snaug gasped. "Did the Control Group get free again?"

A hollow chuckle responded, then the castle slyly answered "Maaayyybe. Either way, Go. Meet. Talk. Walk." Then the castle was gone as it moved on to speak with the Mistresses two possible consorts and found them engaged in a game of chess.

The Castle said nothing at first, listening quietly as the two rivals bantered back and forth. Both me were broad shouldered and taller than the Mistress, but neither towered above her. Both had the Spark and their respective Sparks burned brilliantly. Together, with the Mistress, they had almost brought the Castle back from the brink of it's impending demise on their own. Certainly they had the help of their minions, but the trio had finished in the course of a couple days what other lesser sparks had been trying to finish for nearly two decades. Now a year later, the two were constantly trying to 'one-up' the other in order to win the heart of Agatha Heterodyne.

The Castle loved it and would often help one, then help the other counter, then purposefully sabotage both attempts. The Heterodyne Mistress refused to accept that she could have both, but seemed incapable of making a decision. The Castle despised the silly idea of Monagamy. After all, the Castle could accept many people working on repairing it at once, why couldn't she accept two lovers?

Now, watching the game of chess patiently, the Castle waited for the perfect moment which came quickly when the castle impatiently made a nearby door slam. When the two men looked away, the castle quickly went to work…

############

Gilgamesh Wolfenbach and Tarvek Sturmvoraus quickly glanced to the sound of the slamming door, then as both turned their attention back to the chess game, they both then looked up and began to glare at the other. The first thing that both opponents saw was that they were each one move away from losing, then they both saw that both were one move from winning.

Gilgamesh, Gil for short, shook his head, "That's not were we left off."

Tarvek nodded in agreement, "No, it certainly isn't. However, my turn was next…." Tarvek quickly made the proper move and grinned. "Checkmate."

Gil glowered across the game board for a moment, then grunted. Still staring at Tarvek, he asked aloud. "Does Agatha need something Castle?"

When Tarvek said nothing the Castle sent a blast of energy across the chess board, scattering the game pieces. "Six months ago, that little trick would have sent you both into a bloody brawl."

"True. We are getting used to your trickery." Gil said simply.

"That and Agatha told us both to stop fighting." Tarvek added.

"She is simply no fun sometimes." The castle said with a sigh. A sound that the castle punctuated by causing a breeze to push through the room gently. "As to your question young Wolfenbach, Yes. The Heterodyne asks that you both meet her in the Dining Hall. The Adoptions have arrived."

Tarvek and Gil both looked at each other with raised eyebrows and asked simutaneously, "Adoptions?"


	10. Adoptions?

Lying on it's back was a large mechanical beast. Shaped roughly like a great cat, the ten-foot long body had non-retractable claws that eneded with foot long. The mouth of the great mechanical feline was lined with razor sharp teeth that when shut, resembled an extra-large bear trap. The belly of the beast was opened in what looked like a small service hatch and sticking out from the hatch were the legs of a woman covered with a brown wool skirt. Under the bottom of the skirt, you could catch a glimps of the black and white striped leggings that the woman wore.

The top half of the woman half in and half out of the large clockwork feline was a beautiful blonde-haired woman with large round glaces. The woman was larger-than average breasted with large eyes that when she was not concentrated showed an inner goodness that could not be dampened. The brown wool top of her shirt that matched the skirt she wore was folded nearly and draped over the rear leg of the beast and the white undershirt she wore was marred with grease, just as her arms and left cheek were. The blonde hair was pulled back into a tight braid, but strands had begun to come loose and were falling into her line of sight.

A loud clang sounded from within the belly of the beast and the clockwork feline growled. A single grease coated hand popped up from inside and patted the mechanical cat. "There there, we're almost done."

A loud sound that resembled a purr rolled from the head of the cat.

It was then that she heard the Castle "Ooh, Mistress. We have Visitors in the Hall of Flames."

Pushing back on the rear leg locomotion drive shaft, the Heterodyne woman righted herself and blew a lock of her golden hair out of her eyes. "Tourists?"

"Mistress," The disembodied voice of The Castle replied, "They are in the Hall of Flames. I can certainly treat them like tourists if you like." The Castle's voice ending in a hopeful tone.

"Enemies?" Agatha asked with a sigh.

"No, I don't think so. _IF_ I were to guess, I would say they are joy riding kids that stole some Sparks new toy. They are all young and simply appeared in the hall in a machine of some kind." The Castle answered. "I can escort them out if you….Hmm…"

At the sudden curious pause, Agatha felt her own curiousity suddenly piqued and raised an eyebrow. This pause was also enough to make the large white cat on the closest work bench lift his head. "Unless they brought tribute to the Emperor, boot them out."

"Hush Krosp." Agatha said dismissively. "What is it Castle?"

"Well, they claim they have come to visit their relatives. What is strange is that the two boys seem to be curious, rather than frightened." The Castle replied, the added with a satisfied tone. "The rest seem to show the proper amount of fear. May I send some Jaëger to greet them?"

"No, please don't. We already have enough people that run from the gates as they scream in fear." Agatha said simply.

"Ah, it's such a beautiful sound." The Castle interjected.

"Guide them to the Dining Hall and have Moloch meet them half-way to talk to them. Study them and tell me what you think before they arrive. Let Gil and Tarvek know to meet me there, they will gather the rest. It's nearly dinner time anyhow."

"Can I take them through the Dungeons?" The Castle asked, it's voice rising in a way that could only be called eager.

"No," Agatha said sternly. "What did I say about the Dungeons being a Tourist attraction?"

"But Mistre…"

"No." Agatha said with a grimace.

"The blood is almost all washed off!" The Castle argued.

Agatha pointed to herself and bellowed, "Heterodyne!"

"Fine." The Castle muttered before sending out to completed the tasks assigned to it. The first being the beginning of the tour through the Castle for the visitors, then off to advise the Mistresses best Minion Moloch.

The castle came upon Moloch just as he and his wife, Snaug, as they were trying to clean one of the medical rooms. Moloch, standing just above average in height with black hair and a black beard was a former soldier, and excellent mechanic, and deathly afraid of the Castle. This pleased the Castle greatly.

In a low and sinister voice, the Castle spoke to Moloch and revelled in the sudden look of terror that crossed his face. "Grrreeetings Moloch."

The man jumped as did his brown haired mousey wife. "AGH!" they screamed together.

"We have visitors. You are to meet them in the Red Hall and escort them to the Dining Hall. I will provide the path. Engage them in conversation." The Castle commanded curtly.

"Is this like the time that Baron Dillint sent in his mechanical assassin squad and you wanted me to have a conversation with them?" Moloch asked, both angered at the memory and terrified that it might actually be the same setup.

The Castle gasped, pretending to be hurt by the accusation. "Well of course not. The Mistress simply wants the kids escorted."

Snaug gasped. "Did the Control Group get free again?"

A hollow chuckle responded, then the castle slyly answered "Maaayyybe. Either way, Go. Meet. Talk. Walk." Then the castle was gone as it moved on to speak with the Mistresses two possible consorts and found them engaged in a game of chess.

The Castle said nothing at first, listening quietly as the two rivals bantered back and forth. Both me were broad shouldered and taller than the Mistress, but neither towered above her. Both had the Spark and their respective Sparks burned brilliantly. Together, with the Mistress, they had almost brought the Castle back from the brink of it's impending demise on their own. Certainly they had the help of their minions, but the trio had finished in the course of a couple days what other lesser sparks had been trying to finish for nearly two decades. Now a year later, the two were constantly trying to 'one-up' the other in order to win the heart of Agatha Heterodyne.

The Castle loved it and would often help one, then help the other counter, then purposefully sabotage both attempts. The Heterodyne Mistress refused to accept that she could have both, but seemed incapable of making a decision. The Castle despised the silly idea of Monagamy. After all, the Castle could accept many people working on repairing it at once, why couldn't she accept two lovers?

Now, watching the game of chess patiently, the Castle waited for the perfect moment which came quickly when the castle impatiently made a nearby door slam. When the two men looked away, the castle quickly went to work…

############

Gilgamesh Wolfenbach and Tarvek Sturmvoraus quickly glanced to the sound of the slamming door, then as both turned their attention back to the chess game, they both then looked up and began to glare at the other. The first thing that both opponents saw was that they were each one move away from losing, then they both saw that both were one move from winning.

Gilgamesh, Gil for short, shook his head, "That's not were we left off."

Tarvek nodded in agreement, "No, it certainly isn't. However, my turn was next…." Tarvek quickly made the proper move and grinned. "Checkmate."

Gil glowered across the game board for a moment, then grunted. Still staring at Tarvek, he asked aloud. "Does Agatha need something Castle?"

When Tarvek said nothing the Castle sent a blast of energy across the chess board, scattering the game pieces. "Six months ago, that little trick would have sent you both into a bloody brawl."

"True. We are getting used to your trickery." Gil said simply.

"That and Agatha told us both to stop fighting." Tarvek added.

"She is simply no fun sometimes." The castle said with a sigh. A sound that the castle punctuated by causing a breeze to push through the room gently. "As to your question young Wolfenbach, Yes. The Heterodyne asks that you both meet her in the Dining Hall. The Adoptions have arrived."

Tarvek and Gil both looked at each other with raised eyebrows and asked simutaneously, "Adoptions?"

"Adoptions." The Castle repeated.

Gil kept a straight face and then winked quickly at Tarvek. "I was wondering when the kids would get here." Gils said, suddenly erupting in a grin.

"Weren't they supposed to be here next week?" Tarvek replied.

"No, no. Don't you remember Agatha telling us at dinner on Friday that they would be coming this week?" Gil responded.

Tarvek snapped his fingers, "That's right! I completely forgot." Tarvek started to make his way to the door. "We better get ready then."

"Wait, wait, wait, What do you MEAN they are supposed to be here this week!" The castle bellowed.

Tarvek and Gil both suddenly burst out in laughter as they headed to their respective rooms to get changed while the Castle, realizing it has been outdone growled and began searching the hallways to find the children that had invaded it. Someone was going to regret what those two had done, but in the meanwhile it would take to listening in on these strange children and their escort.


	11. Dinner is served

Agatha, Gil and Tarvek watched in silence as Moloch and led the way into the Great Dining Hall. Along the length of the table were several members of what the Lady Heterodyne considered as her closest friends and allies. Immediately to her left stood Tarvek and to her right stood Gil. After each was space on both sides for the children to sit in the middle of the table, then beyond those empty chairs stood the rest of the current residents of Castle Heterodyne.

Down Tarvek's side stood Violetta the Smoke Knight wearing a simple outfit with her black hair pulled into a tight pony-tail and on her belt was two visible weapons and probably eight unseen in other places. After Violetta stood Agatha's cousin, the dark skinned and black haired Theopholous DuMedd. His Thick side-burns belied his still young face and in his heart burned a strong Spark. In the last spot on Tarvek's side stood Vanamonde von Mekkahn, the Senechal of Mechanicsburg, the city in which Castle Heterodyne was built. His face was relaxed and at ease, though any that knew him knew he was far from a relaxed individual.

Down Gil's side past the empty chairs, stood Bangladesh DuPree, he dark skin and darker eyes a mere hint of crazed personality beneath. Once a member of the Wulfenbach Empire's elite forces, she now studied with the Jaëger monsters. Next to Bangladesh stood the three Jaëger Generals. General Khrizhan, thick and strong with grayish-green skin and a balding head, stood straight backed and the two pair of thick tusks that protruded from the top and bottom jaw near the corners of his mouth were dulled with age. The most unusual feature, as far as Jaëger's were concerned, was that he wore no hat. Zog, the thinnest and youngest of the Generals was still and imposing figure when standing next to a normal person. His teeth were still sharp and a single needle sharp tusk protruded from his bottom jaw just under the spot where a human's canine tooth would be. On his head rested his purple fez hat, with four red diamonds embroidered on the front. The third General, Goomblast, was the largest of the three, looking more like a wall than a walking bipedal creature. When his mouth opened, those speaking to him felt as though they were having a conversation with a wide-mouthed shark, or perhaps a bear trap with smaller but more numerous teeth. His body was covered in a fine lair of green hair and his hat was a bronze skull cap bolted to his skull.

At the end of the table, in very plush chair with a high seat, rested a very large and pure white angora cat. Upon closer inspection, an observer would see that the forelegs of this cat were oddly jointed as were the rear legs. The paws on the forelegs also extended slightly as though with short fingers rather than clawed toes, and one of the small claws even curled around as a thumb would. The one very distinct feature was the red velvet cadet jacket with golden colored tassels on the shoulder and small wood buttons on the front.

Agatha's favorite minion, Moloch, glanced left and right quickly then stepped to his left and turned, bowed at the waist, and gestured into the Hall. "Children, please enter." Then in a muttered voice whispered "good luck."

Agatha's voice echoed across the large hall, "Come in please, and join us for dinner!"

At that moment, the Castle's voice echoed through the room, "The Jaëger are hungry."

General Zog looked up at the ceiling and growled out in a thick accent, "Shot Up Kestle!"

As the Children approached, Agatha introduced each of people around the table, ending with Krosp, the Emperor of Cats.

"Your Liege, I believe you mean." Krosp said at the end of his introduction.

Agatha smiled and replied with a tone that was filled with love and sarcasm, "Of course Sire."

####################

Perry Chittered angrily at the talking cat while Phineas was the first to speak, "Everyone, it's great to meet you! My name is Phineas, this is my brother Ferb, my sister Candace, and our friends, Jeremy, Stacey, Baljeet, Buford, Isabella, and this is Perry, our Platypus."

Agatha smiled and nodded, "It's great to meet you all. We're always happy to have guests, but if you don't mind me asking, how did you get inside the castle?"

Candace snorted, "The same way they get into everything that they shouldn't."

Phineas paid his sister no attention at all and simply answered, "Well, the long version is that we had spent the morning looking over an old photo album with all of our ancestors, you guys, and decided that we wanted to meet you all so we built a time travel machine and came back in time to meet all of you for ourselves."

"You built what?" Gil asked quickly.

"A time machine." Phineas answered as though this was not surprising in the least.

Senechal Vanamonde piqued up just a bit to ask, "You're a bit young for Time Travel aren't you?"

Isabella smiled almost pridefully, "Would it surprise you if I said that you are not the first person to ask that?"

Vanamode let out a soft sigh, "Not really."

Isabella blinked, surprised by Vanamode's respone, "Oh. Well then, yes. Yes they are."

Gil glanced across the table and saw that Tarvek was gently stroking his chin, obviously pondering exactly what he was, but it was Agatha that asked the question they were all thinking. "You say that we are your ancestors?"

Phineas nodded. "You sure are. As my mom says, you are my many times Great Grandmother!"

Agatha smiled sweetly, though her eyes had started to sparkle, "Oh, and is my future husband her as well?"

Phineas nodded and was about to answer when Tarvek interrupted. "Don't answer anymore than that young man."

When Phineas started to ask, Candace spoke up, "Don't you guys remember what happened the last time we travelled in time? I started messing with things and it all went wiggedy… we can't tell them what they don't already know or it could change everything!" Then in a more muted voice, "that's why we shouldn't be here in the first place."

Tarvek nodded, and even Gil agreed, "Your sister is correct." Tarvek said. "No matter how much we would like to know, the more you tell us of our future, the more it can change things.

Gil shrugged, "Perhaps everything that they tell us is why they are here in the first place. If we are part of their past, and they made this trip, then everything they do influences their own existence."

"Why don't we just play it safe." Tarvek said with a scowl.

Gil shrugged. "Sure thing."

Buford blurted out, "Who cares?" then looked straight at General Khrizhan. "I'm your 'whatever' great-grandson." then elbowed Baljeet in the ribs. "So is he."

Stacey blurted out what nearly everyone at the table was thinking, "You two are related?"

Baljeet rolled his eyes and his high voice spoke out in his familiar accent, "So much for that secret."

General Khrizhan squinted as he glared at both Baljeet and Buford. "Are hyu shoor?" He looks more like dat wun." The General grunted as he pointed at Theopholous.

Buford shrugged, "Ask Greats Grandma there." As he pointed at Bangladesh.

Silence dropped like a weight over the table, and became even heavier as Bangladesh suddenly dropped a hand over her stomach, her eyes widening in surprise.

"Very subtle cousin." Baljeet said with a sigh, dropping his head into his hands.

General Zog bellowed suddenly and was joined by Genera Gloomblast. "He iz parts Jaëger. Sootle iz not der strong point."

"Really the two things we were not sure about being real when Mom told us about our ancestors…you…was Krosp and the Castle. We can see they are really real! Krosp talks and so does the Castle."

"The Cat's the amazing one." Candace said suddenly, "A talking Castle isn't all that surprising after you two made our tree forts into fighting robots."

"Can your tree fort do this?" The Castle asked calmly and Candace suddenly found herself strapped into her chair and hanging upside-down over a deep pit filled with what looked magma.

"umm, no." Candace said weakly.

"Who is better?" The castle asked.

"You are.

Jeremy reached up to grab Candace when the straps suddenly loosened and she started falling. Jeremy had his grip by then and pulled her to safety. In the blink of an eye, the chair was back in place. "Close one there," Jeremy said non-chalantely, "but don't' worry though. I would never let you fall."

Candace blushed profusely for a moment and giggled nervously in response before sitting back in her chair, all thoughts of it being over a pit of magma wiped away by Jeremy's comment.

"What's so amazing about Krosp?" Theopholous asked, taking the subject back to the cat.

Krosp sniffed indignantly, "What isn't amazing about me?" as he stood and reached out for a small bowl of cream and began to lap at it.

"Exactly!" Phineas exclaimed. "He talks, has thumbs, he's…he's amazing!"

Krosp sputtered, "I talk and I have thumbs? That is what you find amazing about me?" Glancing between Phineas and Agatha, Krosp scoffed, "Are you sure you're related?"

Agatha silenced Krosp with a glance. "Krosp, despite his delusions of grandeur, is a construct. Surely that is not surprising to you?"

"You mean he's a robot under all that fur?" asked Baljeet.

"Not at all." Gil said, "He was at one time a normal cat, but one of the Sparks on the Castle Wulfenbach experimented on him and placed the mind of a human within him and made some changes to his skeletal structure and gave him some vocal cords." After a pause Gil added, "That last one was probably the worst mistake he made.

Suddenly, Perry chattered angrily again at Krosp. The large cat glanced up, then to Agatha. "I suppose you've never encountered a construct such as I?"

Phineas shook his head emphatically. "No way."

Gil started to say something but Krosp glared at him. "They are from the future. Perhaps Constructs are not as common place for them."

Gil, Not understanding, started to speak again, but Agatha laid her hand over his arm and he fell silent. "I'm sure there must be a reason why they do not know about constructs." Agatha said simply. "Who knows what happens in the future."

At that moment, Moloch and Snaug both entered the dining hall, leading a small group of clockwork constructs, each carrying a tray of food. The diners fell silent as they began eating and all seemed to know that more would be discussed when the meal was finished. Near halfway through the meal, Krosp had excused himself from the table, his belly full of cream and fresh fish. Shortly after, Agatha leaned over the arm of her chair with a small plate of food, then sat back up straight and looked around quickly before asking everyone around the table, "Where's Perry?"


End file.
